MyPunchblog

I wanted to take a moment and say happy holidays to all of my blog readers. I really appreciate that you read my blog, encourage my musings, and share your thoughts with me in the comments.

This has been an extraordinary holiday season for MyPunchbowl — every day, we set a new record for traffic and events planned on the site. And every day, customers from across the globe write to us with comments, feedback, and suggestions about MyPunchbowl. We’re so fortunate to have such a passionate and active customer base.

We would not have accomplished so much without you and your circle of friends. So wherever you find yourself this holiday season, I hope you will be surrounded with love, laughter, and peace.

I got a very sad call tonight from my brother. His beloved (and very crazy) cat Marcel had to be put to sleep. He was only 4 1/2 years old.

In my family, pets are treated as part of the family — so the loss of a pet is very sad. In this case, Marcel’s life was cut short by a known heart condition. My brother and his wife always knew that Marcel would live an abbreviated life, but they never expected a mere 4 1/2 years. That all changed suddenly this evening.

Marcel was a cat that lived life to the fullest. I’ve known many cats in my life, and I’ve never seen a cat so full of energy and so crazy. Here’s just a partial list of things that Marcel could do:

1. Turn on the bathroom faucet himself (yes, himself!), to drink directly from the faucet
2. Jump 3 feet vertically into the air, chasing a toy feather
3. Steal your socks as you’re trying to get dressed (this happened to me on my last visit in July)
4. Sprint across the living room at top speed, so all you saw was a flash of orange (followed by another flash of orange as he ran the other way)

Marcel is a cat who lived his life to the fullest. He wasted no time, and everyone who met him had the same impression: that is one crazy cat.

Do you live your life to the fullest? What would you change if you knew your days on earth were numbered? Would you spend more time with loved ones? Would you spend more time having fun? Would you just act a little more crazy once in a while?

Take a moment today and ponder the life of Marcel and pay him a tribute. Run across the room, or jump straight into the air, or drink directly from the faucet (yes, actually try this… it’s fun). Do something to remind yourself that tomorrow is not promised to anyone — whether you are a cat or a person.

To Marcel: you crazy, crazy cat. You will be sorely missed.

I do a fair amount of traveling. Like most business people, I usually fear getting stuck next to someone chatty on an airplane or a train. The last thing I want on a cross-country flight is to have some random person tell me all about their kids and their latest vacation. My motto when traveling: you ignore me, and I’ll ignore you.

However, even with this philosophy, I try to maintain a high level of civility with my seatmates. I will typically say hello, and do whatever I need to do to make their journey comfortable. For example, I carefully watch where I place my elbows and I make sure that my bag doesn’t impede on their space. I’m cordial and friendly, and try to treat others how I want to be treated.

Just this evening, I took a train from New York City back home to Boston. As I boarded the train, I spotted a seat open in one of those 4 seater areas (Amtrak Acela trains have a nice “desk” area where you can sit with three other people). As I was starting to get settled, it became readily apparent that I had just chosen a seat next to Chatty Cathy and her friend. After about 1 minute of listening to how much they loved Rockefeller Center, I high-tailed it to another seat. I said hello to the man in the seat and asked if I could sit in the seat next to him. He smiled, said hello, and I sat down. I immediately apologized for the pizza I had carried onto the train (note to people who bring pungent foods on airplanes: please stop). He laughed appreciatively. And that was that.

Over the next hour and a half, he ignored me, and I ignored him. Traveling bliss. However, on the train you can use your cell phone so it’s hard to ignore the conversation that’s happening two feet from your ears. He heard my conversations, and I heard his. Shortly after our phone calls ended, I took out my laptop to get a little bit of work done. As soon as he saw me do this, he quickly mentioned that he was about to get up. After a brief exchange, we decided to switch seats. We exchanged some small talk, and that was it.

After he came back, I decided to continue our small talk with a more substantive question — and from there we launched into a conversation about our respective businesses. What transpired over the next hour was a conversation that was informative, thought-provoking, and very useful to me. We talked about a broad range of topics and realized that we know a lot of people in common in the startup world.

The specifics of what we talked about aren’t important. But here is what IS important: with a quick and cordial hello a conversation blossomed. We found out that we could actually help each other and potentially do some business together. I learned a bunch, and I’m hoping he did too. I left the conversation feeling both energized and more connected to the business world around me. It didn’t take much to start the conversation — and I’m glad I did.

So next time you’re on a train or plane, say hello to the person sitting next to you. Be cordial and respectful, and listen for cues to figure out whether they want to continue the conversation. You never know where it might lead.

Hey Jeff D: Thanks for saying hello. It was a pleasure to meet you.

A few weeks ago, we launched MyPunchbowl eCard Studio. One of things I love about eCard Studio is that it gives me the ability to use MyPunchbowl for everyday occasions. On an almost daily basis, I find a reason to use MyPunchbowl eCard Studio. Consider a few example from the last week:

• A colleague of mine had some minor surgery, I sent her an ‘get well soon’ eCard
• My sister-in-law celebrated her birthday, I sent her a birthday card through Facebook
• My wife was having a challenging day at work — I sent her a “thinking of you” eCard
• A friend of mine turned 30, I sent him a birthday ecard

Obviously I’m biased, but I find that MyPunchbowl eCards are suitable replacement for traditional paper greeting cards. With a few clicks of a mouse, I can send a thoughtful, personal, and sophisticated greeting card. No run to the stationary store, no stamps required, no post office — and it’s free.

So who in your life are you thinking about today? Why not send them an free eCard from MyPunchbowl?

A very wise man taught me an important lesson about a year ago:

Rather than saying “but”, try saying “and” instead.

I remember when I first heard this advice, my first reaction was that this was another one of those trite phrases that people like to say sometimes. However, I really trust the person who shared his wisdom with me, so I took the time to carefully listen to his perspective.

He told me that the word “but” is one of those words that triggers a negative response in most people. With this simple word, you can signal that you disagree or that there is some condition to the statement you just made. Consider the following phrases:

• I love your idea, but I don’t think it’s right for this scenario.
• The numbers may suggest that, but I don’t think you’ve analyzed them correctly
• I think you’re great for the position, but I need to think about whether you’ll be a good fit in our company

The word “and” signals that you have something to add to the conversation. It doesn’t put people on the defensive, and opens up everyone to a more productive conversation. Consider the phrases from above — this time with “and” instead of “but”:

• I love your idea, and I have some ideas of my own I would like to share with you.
• The numbers may suggest that, and I have another interpretation of the data
• I think you’re great for the position, and I want to spend more time thinking about how you fit in our organization

Do you use the word “but” more than the word “and”? Try an experiment today: everytime you want to say the word “but”, try substituting the word “and.” How do your conversations change? Are they more positive? I’d love to hear your experiences in the comments of this blog post.

Thank you to the person who taught me this important lesson — and I hope this post brings a smile to your face.

A few weeks ago, TechCrunch had an article about a young entrepreneur in the Midwest named Jenae who is starting a marketing company called “Girl in Your Shirt.” The premise is simple: for $75, Jenae will spend the day promoting your website around the Internet. The cool thing is that she creates a video on the Girl in Your Shirt site as well as a few of the other newer video websites (such as Seesmic).

When I saw the original article about TechCrunch, I spent a few minutes checking out her site. With a name like “Girl in Your Shirt,” I wanted to make sure that it was an appropriate site and that MyPunchbowl would be represented well. The frequently asked questions mollified my concerns: “However keep in mind that I do not wear tank tops or any other “revealing” attire and reserve the right to reject any offer that I deem inappropriate, offensive, distasteful, etc.”

I immediately filled out the form and submitted a request for Jenae to feature MyPunchbowl on Monday, December 1st. The next morning, I heard from Jenae, and we were all set to go. (One interesting note: a few hours after I paid for our Girl in Your Shirt day, one of our investors wrote me a note saying “Girl in Your Shirt” sounds right up our alley).

We sent Jenae a package — which included a t-shirt (of course), some stickers, a car magnet, and my favorite: some Big League Chew. On Monday, Jenae featured MyPunchbowl all over the Internet. She did a great job. I was really impressed at how thoughtful and positive the videos were, and she clearly spent some time getting to know the site. She talked about MyPunchbowl Design Studio and MyPunchbowl eCard Studio and did a nice job describing the features and benefits of our site. If you have a website that you want to promote, you would be foolish not to include Girl in Your Shirt as part of your marketing mix.

Here’s one of the videos that Jenae produced for MyPunchbowl. Thanks Jenae!

MyPunchbowl, a critically acclaimed website to organize and plan parties and events, today announced the launch of MyPunchbowl eCard
Studio. MyPunchbowl eCard Studio offers beautiful, customizable and free eCards that are perfect for the holiday greeting card season.

MyPunchbowl eCard Studio enables users to create eCards that have the look and feel of traditional paper greeting cards. With complete customization controls, users can modify color, text, fonts, or upload their own photo to create a truly personalized design. MyPunchbowl eCard Studio offers hundreds of designs and provides an eco-friendly alternative for those who want to send beautiful holiday eCards, attractive birthday eCards, or thoughtful thank you eCards.

“In these challenging economic times, we’re excited to introduce a product that makes it possible to send high-quality online greeting cards without the cost of paper and stamps,” said Matt Douglas, CEO, Punchbowl Software. “MyPunchbowl eCard Studio surpasses what most people thought was possible for an eCard website.”

With MyPunchbowl eCard Studio, users can easily share their customized eCard over email or on social networking sites such as Facebook and Twitter. These sharing features make it easy to send holiday greeting cards to your friends quickly and easily.

“I didn’t think it was possible to send high-quality Christmas eCards through the web,” said Laura Salafia, a MyPunchbowl user. “With unique designs and the ability to include a picture of my family, I’m turning to MyPunchbowl eCard Studio for my holiday cards this year.”

Key functionality of MyPunchbowl eCard Studio allows users to:
• Choose from hundreds of pre-made, customizable, free eCards for a variety of occasions
• Instantly customize the color of your eCard
• Upload your own photo to create your own eCard
• Add personalized text or include an additional note beside your eCard
• Send your eCards to multiple email addresses at the same time
• Share your eCard on social networking sites such as Facebook and Twitter

MyPunchbowl eCard Studio is the perfect complement to the extensive event and party planning capabilities available on MyPunchbowl. With the addition of eCard Studio, MyPunchbowl adds another feature to enhance the end-to-end party planning experience. To try MyPunchbowl eCard Studio today, visit http://www.mypunchbowl.com/ecards

In the past couple of weeks, I’ve had a few spirited debates with some of my most trusted advisers. In each of the conversations, we had substantially opposing points of view. I’m surrounded with some *very* smart people, so any point of view that’s presented is usually very well thought out and stems from years of experience. However, when two smart people debate, there is often disagreement. As the CEO of a startup, it’s really important for me to listen to the opinions of those around me. But at the end of the discussion and debate, I have to make a decision — and I want to make sure that the entire company is behind me. So what happens when we don’t agree?

In these situations, I’ve found that there is really only one solution. It may sound trite, but it’s an important concept: you simply have to agree to disagree. What does that mean and what should you do? Here’s my list of the things to do when you agree to disagree:

1. First, and most importantly, you have to end the discussion. When the discussion gets to an impasse, it doesn’t help to keep debating. Agree to disagree and then move on quickly.
2. Make sure the other person feels like they have been heard. Say things like, “I hear your point of view, and I see your logic.” That will go a long way to helping everyone move on after the conversation has ended.
3. Show respect for the other person. Say “I really respect the time and energy that you’ve put into this discussion, but let’s agree to disagree.
4. Don’t revisit the topic again: it’s unlikely that a new discussion will result in a different outcome, so don’t enter into another debate about the same topic. Agree to disagree and move on.
5. Document both points of view shortly after the discussion ends. Whether you jot down notes or send a follow-up email, it’s important to try to capture the salient points of each person in the conversation
6. Admit when you’re wrong: if you agree to disagree and then later figure out that the other person was right, it’s important to admit that your point of view was wrong or flawed. This builds trust and better understanding — which is very important in any relationship.
7. Use humor: at the end of a debate it’s important to try and clear the air. I’ve always found that humor can help in these situations. Use wit and humor to help move the conversation to another topic.

What did I miss? Do you agree with my list? If not, let’s agree to disagree - and please post your thoughts in the comments.

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Planning a holiday party? Send a save the date using MyPunchbowl today!

Yesterday, I wrote about National Men Make Dinner Day, held every year on the first Thursday in November. Last night, I made Turkey Chili. By Jessica’s reaction, it was clearly a big success.

I thought I would share my recipe for Turkey Chili, in case you want to try and make it too:

• 1 lb of ground turkey meat
• 1 can of stewed tomatoes
• 1 can of tomato sauce
• 1 can of kidney beans
• 2 tablespoons of chili powder
• 1 tablespoon of cumin powder
• 1 tablespoon of garlic salt

Brown the turkey meat in a large skillet. Stir in the stewed tomatoes and the tomato sauce. Rinse the kidney beans thoroughly, add them in. Stir in the spices, and season to taste. Cook on a low simmer for 15 minutes.

We also had corn bread with the chili. Here’s a picture of the full meal (note it was served with my favorite beer: Modelo Especial):

If anyone reading this blog decides to make the turkey chili, please send me a picture and I will post it on this blog. It wasn’t too hard to make — and Jessica’s reaction was certainly worth it.

So I’m sitting here quietly in my office, working on a few bigger issues today. My wonderful wife (Jessica) just popped up on my gmail chat screen to sweetly alert me that today apparently is “National Men Make Dinner Day.” Now, truth be told, most of the time Jessie makes dinner. She is a fantastic cook (and an even better baker) and I know that I’m very lucky to have her take care of most meals. However, recently I’ve been trying to make dinner more often. She loves it when I make dinner, and when my schedule is not crazy, I don’t mind to make dinner once in a while.

This past weekend, when we sat down to talk about the week ahead, I told Jess that I would make dinner on Thursday night. I picked out what I was going to make (Turkey chili), looked up the ingredients, and even cracked open a few cookbooks to find the best recipe. I’m ready to make the chili, and plan to start it when I get home from work tonight.

How ironic. It is National Men Make Dinner Day — yet I seemed to have a sixth sense that today was the right day to volunteer to make dinner. Thankfully, the recipe does not include any of the following (specifically called out as “no-no’s” on the National Men Make Dinner Day website:)

Foods that should “not” be part of Men Make Dinner Day (text courtesy of National Men Make Dinner Day website)

Although some of the foods that I am about to list may sound like a tempting addition to your meal — they should never be part of “National Men Make Dinner Day”:

* chewing gum
* cotton candy
* take-out pizza
* pogos
* left-overs from last night
* sandwiches from office vending machine
* neighbors left-overs from last night
* anything bar-b-qued

To all of my faithful blog readers: celebrate this holiday. Share this post. Visit the National Men Make Dinner Day website. Use MyPunchbowl to send a last minute “National Men Make Dinner Day” invitation. And mark it down on your calendar for next year. I think this is a holiday that is only going to get bigger.

(Image courtesy of the National Men Make Dinner website)